I'm only 16 and had to face one of the most difficult decisions in my life. I had an abortion. Before yesterday (8-24-07) I had heard stories of women who went through abortions and had promised myself-- not only because of my religious beliefs, but also because of my moral values-- that I would never put myself in a situation where I'd end up having to get an abortion. But here I am at the age of 16 and yesterday I had an abortion.

It was the toughest thing I had to face. It happened so fast. One moment my life was going fine, then my period never came. I was worried and so was my boyfriend. I had gotten a home pregnancy test-- two of them! I was unsure of the results, hoping there was a mistake, but when I went to a clinic and got it done there... sure enough, I was tested positive for a pregnancy. Right then and there my world came crashing down at my feet.

My hopes of becoming a doctor, my hopes of helping my family out with bills, and watching my brothers and sisters... It was enough I had to always babysit my three other step-siblings, but now my stepmother is pregnant with another. I couldn't dare to put this burden on my father who 'til this day still sacrifices so much for me and my family. He's my hero and I would never want to disappoint him. Just all the thoughts running through my head, it was enough to get me thinking.

At first I thought of it and my religious beliefs were so strong I didn't care about what anyone would say, but then my future set into play and I began to think, "What about college, universities, medical school, etc? What about me?" Then again, I thought "there I go being the selfish person I am. Always thinking about me." So time passed and as it did, the voices of my family members and especially my father began to grow louder in volume in my head. I couldn't help it anymore. So after a long deliberation with my boyfriend, we had both decided it was the best for both of us and our families if we had the abortion.

Just days before school starts up again for my junior year, I'm sitting in the waiting room waiting for my name to be called. Once it's called I go to the back room to have my ultrasound. I wanted to cry, but to be strong for myself, I let no emotion show. The second time my name was called I had returned to the back to get a quick check up and was given medicine to take. The third time my name was called, I got up and with all the love in my heart and soul, I knew it was time to let go. I went to another room where I knew the surgery was going to be done, got undressed and sat there thinking, praying for forgiveness.